Rehearsing the worst
Have you seen that image floating around on social media where it looks like the year 2020 is being “rated?” It gets 1 out of 5 stars and beneath are the words, “would not recommend.” I laugh out loud every time I see it. Heaven knows, we all need a little comic relief!
It’s August. And it’s understandable if you’re starting to limp around a little bit. For some of us, anxiety and uncertainty have taken up residence in our minds and hearts like unwelcome house guests as we wonder, “What next?”
It’s natural to worry. It’s one way our brain tries to protect us. In more primitive times, if someone ANTICIPATED a bear attack, they’d be more capable of handling the threat when it came. The problem is, MOST of us aren’t encountering real bears on a daily basis. But our “survival brain” can’t always discern that.
When’s the last time you were up at 2am rehearsing the worst-case scenario?
It’s exhausting! Anxiety and worry are often the most active during the middle of the night because we are tired and it’s dark and there aren’t any distractions (except for, perhaps, your husband snoring. #lovehimmoreduringtheday). Rehearsing the worst is tempting because it FEELS like we might be gaining some control or certainty. But, with endless possibilities, and no “magic-8 ball”, the rehearsal doesn’t actually produce REAL peace or safety for us.
A much more effective strategy is what I call “Reflecting on Resources.”
It’s a simple mindset shift that allows our brains to move from a state of helplessness to a state of empowerment. It’s like choosing to walk down a different path…except that the path isn’t visible….it’s just a new way of thinking.
Everyone, no matter what, has SOME resources, even during times of great struggle. We have some INNER resources and we have some OUTER resources. What are YOUR resources?
1) INNER resources are:
· Your characteristics/capabilities – What qualities or traits do you possess that make you unique? On your best day, what are you like? What would the people who know you best say they admire about you the most?
· The challenges you’ve already overcome – How have you handled struggles, navigated challenges, and overcome difficult seasons in the past?
2) OUTER resources are:
· Family or friends – Who reminds you that you’re not alone? Who do you know you can rely on because they’ve been there for you in the past or simply because you know they love you?
· Community – What resources do you have access to because of the community at large? What support or expertise is at your disposal because you live in your neighborhood, city or even country?
· Faith – What experiences have you had which opened your eyes to God’s presence and provision in your life?